


sick and sinful life

by roadworkaheaduhyeahisurehopeitdoes



Series: the life to which he clung [1]
Category: The Mechanisms (Band)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Guns, Identity Issues, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Mirrors, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, be careful, hes not doin too good, jonny sims: makes a character, me: its free real estate, projecting :), space cowboys yeehaw bitch
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:27:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24398005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roadworkaheaduhyeahisurehopeitdoes/pseuds/roadworkaheaduhyeahisurehopeitdoes
Summary: jonny is not the man in the mirror.
Series: the life to which he clung [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1761748
Comments: 6
Kudos: 61





	sick and sinful life

**Author's Note:**

> me posting twice in a day bc i like projecting and jonny sims' characters are free real estate? its more likely than you think.

The reflection in the mirror, the brand new one that had been bought the last one they had been on a planet, shining, lit by the artificial lights, was not Jonny d'Ville. Jonny stood on one side of the mirror, hands clenched against the sink and sweat dripping down his head. On the other side stood a young man, grinning and running his hands through his muddled hair as he made a bet. He lit a cigarette and threw back his head in laughter, as if talking to a close friend. Jonny d'Ville looked at Jonny Vangelis, and Jonny Vangelis paid Jonny d'Ville no mind.

Jonny Vangelis could not see Jonny d'Ville. The man on the other side of the mirror could have not existed to the young man, who carelessly gambled his freedom away. He, in a way, _did not_ exist to Jonny Vangelis. Only Jonny Vangelis existed to Jonny Vangelis, and the impact of his actions were a leaf on the breeze.

Jonny d'Ville wished he could not see Jonny Vangelis. The boy on the other side of the mirror did not exist anymore to the immortal, who carelessly gambled his life away. He no longer existed, left on New Texas with a bullet in his chest. Jonny d'Ville was left, and there could be no impact of his actions for all he saw.

There was no way for Jonny d'Ville to not exist. He could pretend all he wanted (and he did, leaving bullet holes through his clothing and starving himself for days on end and cutting himself off from the others until there was nothing, not even the maniacal laughter.) but he would always exist until he didn't, and there was nothing he could do to change it. Not the searing pain of bullets nor the slide of a knife or the burn of fire or slowly, slowly withering away until there was nothing left but a fake, unfeeling heart. Every time he was reborn. Every _goddamn_ time. 

Jonny d'Ville stared at Jonny Vangelis until he was killed, a bullet torn through his chest and blood pooling from his lips, then a bullet tore through Jonny d'Ville's chest and black, oily blood pooled from Jonny d'Ville's lips. 

Jonny Vangelis was gone. Jonny d'Ville might as well have been.


End file.
